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Teething Toy
retold by
S. E. Schlosser

Well now, you've probably heard it rumored that here in Deadwood we have such a tough neighborhood that our babies teeth on guns. And the fact of the matter is, this is the very truth.

I happen to know the lady who was responsible for the start of this rumor. Nice woman, married with a baby. One afternoon, she saw a drifter approaching her house. She knew he would bother her something fierce for food and take advantage of her. So she took out her husband's gun. To her dismay, she found that it weren't loaded. Jest then, that drifter walked right in the door without knocking or nothing. So the woman dropped the empty gun into the crib and tried to fend him off.

The drifter was all set to take every bite of food the little lady had prepared for her husband's dinner, and give her a hard time to boot. But he happened to glance into the crib, and saw the woman's little feller jest gumming away at the handle of the gun. Well that drifter turned pale and high-tailed it out of there. Left Deadwood as far behind as he could. He didn't cotton to the idea of stayin' in a place where the babies teeth on guns.

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© S.E. Schlosser 1997 - 2008.

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